Dear Coog,
This may be way more than you are capable of answering, but I am completely fascinated with a married man, and he is with me. We have never acted on our feelings for each other. I’m not married or even in a relationship, but the flirting is keeping me so distracted it’s almost ridiculous. I know I have to end this because I would not want to put someone’s marriage in jeopardy, but how?
Thanks,
Manager of a married man mess
Dear Manager,
Can we say doom, boys and girls? Not to sound like a parent, but are you crazy? You are possibly tempting a married man to break his vows, disrupt his family life, jeopardizing your own education, and this could all end in a broken heart.
You have already told me you know what you are doing is wrong, and just like admitting to an addiction, admittance is the first step to recovery. Now you must figure out which way of ending the relationship will be the least upsetting for you.
The easiest way is the policy I have preached here before: honesty. Be honest with this man and let him know that you are both wrong for even testing this relationship out. He knows what he is doing, and if in all honesty, he wants to continue the relationship, then think about this: what if, by wild happenstance, you are married one day and your spouse does the same thing to you? Would you not feel that karma has come full circle?
Because you are a UH student, regardless of your age, you are too young to be fooling with a married man. Leave him be and let his wife be the one he flirts with. There are many fish in the sea, so grab your gear and go catch yourself the perfect one!
This goes out to everyone – you are too valuable to throw yourself at someone who is unavailable or to waste your time chasing something you can’t have. You are all better than that.
I hope this helped,
Coog
You can email Coog your questions at: [email protected].
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