Employee-flavored yogurt not too tasty

The DNA of 31-year-old Anthony Garcia was matched to semen found in yogurt in Albuquerque, N.M., the Associated Press reported on Thursday.

Police first responded to a 911 call at an Albuquerque grocery store on Jan. 26 after a woman spit out a yogurt sample she was given from a store employee that she thought was instead a bodily fluid.

As it turns out, the woman’s hunch was right. Forgive us for being appalled, but we can’t understand what would compel someone to do something like this in the first place.

Worrying about servers spitting in one’s food has been a running joke between consumers for ages, but no one realistically expects for that to happen. Even more than that, we probably would’ve never thought that someone would have the audacity to hand out yogurt samples tainted with semen.

Finding saliva in your food is one thing, but finding semen is something on a completely different level.

It’s unclear to us how this happened. We have no clue where the idea to mix bodily fluids into food samples offered at the grocery store this man worked at came from. The actions that followed suit aren’t very clear — or even a desirable thought, either.

Since reports of the tainted yogurt have been released, more women have come forward claiming that they were given samples, too. Some claims even date back to December; however, there’s no way to prove that they were victims as well, police say.

Besides facing a potential charge for battery — which is only a misdemeanor charge — from the Albuquerque Police Department, this terrific specimen of humanity could face a federal felony charge for food tampering, the Associated Press reported.

Garcia was taken away in handcuffs — not for this disgusting act — but for an outstanding warrant for child molestation, kidnapping and bribery.