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Monday, August 3, 2020

Opinion

The Cougar’s 15 predictions for 2015


Some things never change — here are our predictions for the New Year:

  1. Students will continue to complain about parking but will refuse to leave their house 15 minutes earlier to avoid rush.
  2. UH sidewalks will continue to send skateboards and ankles alike to their demise.
  3. Houstonians will still root for their city’s teams but will notice a much more attractive bandwagon late in the season. That means you, Astros fans.
  4. Fire alarms will continue to wake up students at 3 a.m.
  5. Students will get parking tickets but will continue to park in the same spot.
  6. Incoming freshmen will eat, sleep and live at the gym to avoid the Freshman 15.
  7. Students will adopt a vegetarian diet, dine exclusively at Freshii and then succumb to Chick-Fil-A in 7-10 business days.
  8. The old elevators in M.D. Anderson Library will continue to be creepy.
  9. In one week, that class you thought would be a blow-off class will become a GPA killer.
  10. Sasha will always take Shasta back, even when she finds him flirting with the female fans at sporting events.
  11. There will be no more “maggots” in the food at the Moody Towers cafeteria.
  12. Frontier Fiesta will have big-name performers like Iggy Azalea, Taylor Swift and Houston’s own Beyoncé (OK, so maybe it’s a long-shot).
  13. CASA will continue to be the root of all that is evil in the entire universe.
  14. That one guy will continue to stand in front of M.D. Anderson Library proclaiming that 95 percent of us are going to hell.
  15. Students will get the opportunity to experience all four seasons in a week. And they will hate it.

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