When it comes to matters of the heart, we often say one thing and do something different — that is human nature. We often describe the ideal partner with romantic, monogamous notions of finding the one and being happy the rest of our lives. Many actually succeed in finding that special person, and for a while, happiness abounds, at least, until couples get bored with each other.
It is from this boredom that infidelity breeds, and one of the ways we often try to take our minds off of our boredom is music, and this day and age, infidelity in music is still as prominent today as it ever has been.
Infidelity has been portrayed in culture as far back as recorded history goes, and in these times, it remains a popular subject in pop culture. In movies and books, indiscretions are either visually portrayed or spelled out for the reader; therefore, they are easier to pick up on. In music, these messages, while often obvious, can sometimes pass so quickly that audiences don’t pick up on the references.
There are some songs that will only mention cheating as a passing thought, causing listeners to wonder why this piece of the lyric was even necessary. For example, take Jamie Foxx, a popular comedian and actor who has also dabbled in music. His song, “Blame It on the Alcohol,” is all about a guy going to club, hitting on someone else’s drunken lover and stealing her right out from under him.
Other songs are subtler with the infidelity, such as Enrique Iglesias’s song “I Like It.” Most of the song is filled with references to sex and dancing like the cheating reference at the beginning, “My girlfriend is out of town, and I’m all alone. Your boyfriend is on vacation, and he doesn’t have to know.”
While there are songs in which cheaters get punished, like Carrie Underwood’s “Before He Cheats,” these are outweighed by a slew of songs that make it adventurous, almost acceptable to be unfaithful.
“Cheating is bad, but it is also shown as exciting,” history junior Cesar Martinez said. “It’s (portrayed) like, ‘Who cares if you don’t get caught?’”
Nutrition junior Laura Ngyuen said the cues are so casual that the consequences of cheating have become trivial in nature.
“The consequences (of cheating) don’t seem as bad in movies, music and stuff … it doesn’t seem as serious,” she said.
According to infidelityfacts.com, 57 percent of men and 54 percent of women have admitted to committing infidelity in their relationship, while 74 percent of men and 68 percent of women admitted that they would have an affair if they knew they would never get caught. This is reflected in the music we listen to.
Although, physically cheating is not the only form of cheating. Many consider the act of liking someone else, regardless of acting on it, a form of cheating. Biomedical engineer freshman Sara Siddiq said having romantic feelings for someone other than your significant other is like living a lie.
“When you’re mentally cheating, you’re lying throughout the whole relationship,” Siddiq said. “You’re making (your significant other) think that they’re the most important person to you, but they’re not because you like someone else.”
While no relationship is perfect, and there are bound to be a ton of mistakes made in each relationship, don’t make a mistake that can easily be prevented. Cheating is one of the most selfish things one can do in a relationship and certainly should not be glorified in pop culture — music included. We should be writing songs about resisting the urge to cheat and glorifying the ideal of being true to the one you love. There aren’t enough of those songs these days.
So when you’re at how this weekend with the one you love, think about why you fell in love in the first place. Tell them how special they are and have a little fun this weekend and keep that spark going, oh, and turn the stereo off or play up some slow jazz.
Kelly Schafler is a print journalism sophomore and may be reached at [email protected].