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Thursday, September 23, 2021

Opinion

Lady Gaga’s lunacy heads for Final Frontier


The last instance I can recall of a pop star singing in space was Britney Spears in the “Oops! … I Did It Again” video — with the most innovative red latex space suit in the history of astronaut fashion. But that is soon to change as yet another songstress is ready to prove why the sky is never the limit, quite literally.

Who better to blast off into astronomical heights than the enigma that rose to fame for her own alien-esque tendencies? Hold your applause, Gaga has found her homeland — and the perfect stage.

As what some would consider her greatest antic to date, Gaga recently confirmed to Vanity Fair that she has secured a 2015 Virgin Galactic ticket to outer space. If that wasn’t mind-blowing enough for her “Little Monsters,” the powerhouse will also give a performance among the stars. No, not Jennifer Lawrence or Jude Law. Actual stars. Reports from Us Weekly said the concert will feature one song (because, obviously, any more would be too disturbing for the Martians), which has yet to be decided upon.

When asked about the journey, Gaga said, “I was asked specifically to sing, so I will be the first recording artist to sing in space.”

This party in the sky is extremely exclusive, so her fans will not be in attendance. In fact, the audience will most likely be craters and asteroids.

“This is a special festival event held by Zero G Colony,” she said.

This comes just after the release of her third studio album, “Artpop,” on Nov. 6, which has surprisingly fallen short of her previous albums’ successes. Although No. 1 on the UK chart, “Artpop” sold only 260,000 copies in the United States during its first week, a definite fall from the 1.1 million copies sold of “Born This Way” the first week of its release in 2011. Despite the initial numbers, however, “Artpop” is quickly rising in popularity. The track “Venus” suggests Gaga knew of her upcoming expedition and promptly churned out a celebratory explosion of repetitive phrases and robotic atmospherics. You go, Gaga.

Virgin Galactic’s Spaceship Company has been working diligently for nearly 10 years to commercialize the SpaceshipOne technology, winner of the Ansari X prize in 2004. SpaceshipTwo, an innovative spacecraft intended to take tourists on a ride to space, is still in the testing stage. The earliest flights are set to take off in 2015, with celebrities lining up for the expedition, despite its risks. Scaled composites of the rocket have experienced troubling setbacks, the most public being the devastating explosion in 2007 that took three lives at Mojave Air and Space Port.

However, this would not faze Gaga, being arguably the most fearless performer to ever reach stardom. But despite her penchant for egg-cocoon-pods and flying dresses, there are other people who could be more worthy of experiencing such a remarkable historical landmark. The should the rich and famous shouldn’t be the first to tour the solar system, especially with all the  privileges they have.

Because it is only 2013, there is still time for Gaga to burrow away into a flying burrito and hover somewhere else. There is no need for Gaga in space. But as liberating as her music maybe, if she does go to another planet, maybe we can just leave her there.

Something tells me she’d get along just fine.

Opinion columnist Alex Meyer is a creative writing freshman and may be reached at [email protected]

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