Advice Opinion

To the frustrated student dealing with family troubles

Dear Frustrated,

Family is both great to have and frustrating to deal with. You have gone your entire life dependent upon them for advice, love and financial support. However, now that you are in college and, more importantly, on your own, some of these areas of your life have changed.

Sure, they may still pay for college, or maybe not, but now you have friends, maybe a partner and people all around you to interact with and create a new life with. It may be easy for you to transition, but for your family, it may not. They are losing something and you are gaining it. You have been a major part of their life for so long, and now you are trying to start one of your own. It is hard for them to let go.

The best advice I can offer you is first to be patient. If you try to be angry at them, you’re not just hurting them; you’re hurting yourself. You have to stay patient in the fact that things will improve. Second, talk to them about how you feel. It may seem silly, but express that you’re trying to have your own life, and although you have appreciated everything they’ve done, you need them to allow you that opportunity to make your own mistakes. They should trust that they have done a great job in teaching you how to make decisions.

The final advice I can offer is for you to just keep moving forward. The last thing you want to do is alienate yourself from them, but you also should not focus on them. Continue to live your own life. Actions speak louder than words, and showing them that you can have your own life will help them see that. It’s time for them to let you prove that they have done a great job at raising you. Good luck, and I hope that your frustrations fade away.

Yours truly,


Questions and letters may be submitted to [email protected]


  • Nelson Mandela died on December 5th — perhaps one of the last great leaders of the last 150 years, and the best the Daily Cougar can come up with in their edition three days later is sports reporting, some UH media press releases, and a cheesy advise column? This is a disgrace while the world morns this great peacekeeper. Coogs should hang their heads in shame. To this Coog, this is not a a newspaper worth reading, but an embarrassment to the 4th estate.

    • Alex, is that your real name. Shut your trap. And the 150 years and all that you came up is that Mandela was a great leader. With respect to Mandela, he is not going to help me pass the exams. You stupid bastard, talking about their heads in shame.

      • Mandela and his wife were good at necklacing political enemies(including children). I adore Mandela’s activities. I wish we could all follow his example

  • I can’t wait until you get censored by racists and bigots, Ryan….The comments here won’t even let me express my opinion through meme.

  • I love how the people who are talking about ‘shame’ and ‘racist’ are the ones that criticize every single article. If you don’t like what the Daily Cougar has to offer, don’t read it, simple as that. Great advice Ryan! I’m actually going through this myself.

    • Simple as this…
      Some people don’t have parents.
      Some people have parents that are racists & bigots
      Some people pay for school on there own.
      Some people get censored for speaking their mind.

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