Ask Ashley: On frogs (again), money, more
In The Cougar’s weekly anonymous advice column, I talk about frogs, money to buy something and books to keep an eye out for. To submit your questions for future issues, click the “Ask Ashley” button on our home page.
Ashley, my frog died after following your advice last time. I don’t know how I’ll ever get over the loss of my dear Reginald. Can you buy me a new frog?
Hey, anon! While the death of your frog is very sad, I can’t let you ruin my digital footprint with alleged frog murder. It would be horrible to have that part of my legacy on this campus.
I did make it known to you that I don’t have the slightest clue about taking care of frogs. I even did my due diligence and suggested going to PetSmart for extra help.
As for coping after the death of, um, Reginald, I find going to a luxurious restaurant helps.
Have you heard of Gen Korean BBQ House? If not, hear me out: all you can eat buffet, drinks and a 20 percent tip. Will you smell like barbeque after eating? Yes, but at least you will feel better. To make it an even more fun experience, take a couple of friends with you or maybe invite me, it’s all up to you.
Hey there, frogman again. I forgot to plug my Venmo for the new frog you owe me. My Venmo is @ripreginald$123. Reginald II will run you about a cool $876 before taxes as he is a very rare froggo. Not very pushin’ P of you bro.
You again? What kind of frog is $876? I’m not going to lie, but I am questioning your choices.
How? Well for starters, out of all names to give to a frog, you picked Reginald. Who names their frog Reginald? Your frog is expensive, so give it an expensive name. You can name it Material Girl, Dubai or Birkin. And while I won’t pay for a frog I’m not responsible for, I will leave you with this advice: just find another frog outside.
It is free, and while it won’t look the same, it still functions as a frog. I hope this helps anon. Losing a pet is sad, but I’m hoping you find some peace.
Also, I can’t believe I have to do this, but for future people seeking animal advice: The Cougar takes no liability for anything that happens with your pet. “Ask Ashley” is for entertainment purposes and not written by a professional. Please take most of what I say with a grain of salt, sand, sugar or whatever fits your boat.
Ashley, may you recommend something to read (books, articles, whatever)? I am looking for anything genre-wise or lengthwise.
Whoa, finally, a question that is not unhinged. Howdy, anon, and thanks for your question.
I’m a book lover, but I haven’t been leisurely reading for some time. I recently got back into it, so forgive me if my list of suggestions is limited. For starters, I am a romantic at heart, so I read a lot of contemporary romance books. I like the dissociative aspect of it, where I feel like I’m in the character’s world.
Some of my favorite romance books are anything written by Meg Cabot, “The Girl With Stars in Her Eyes,” “The Kiss Quotient” and “The Hating Game.” I also am really into fantasy fiction. However, I haven’t read too much of it recently, so I can’t really suggest anything new. Younger me liked fantasy literature series such as “The Raven Cycle,” “Percy Jackson and the Olympians,” and “The Shadowhunter Chronicles.”
Outside of books, I can’t really say I read many articles that help stimulate your brain cells. As a pop culture and fashion enthusiast, I mostly read the latest celebrity drama on TMZ and upcoming fashion trends through Teen Vogue and Vogue. With the latest season of “The Bachelor” and “Euphoria” on right now, I’m also reading think pieces on Twitter.
I hope you found something interesting to read from my suggestions. I don’t think you did, but I still hope it helps.