There needs to be a rule that does not allow Halloween to fall on a day before the work week. Saturday and Sunday mornings just seem better equipped to handle a hangover.
Hopefully you woke up today with some time to spare, because we have a cure to make up for the hardships that you put your body through the previous nights.
First things first, you need to start looking like a normal person as soon as possible. Removing makeup is something most men have very little experience with. Whenever I used to put on makeup, I scrubbed my face until it turned red and most of it was off.
However, olive oil showed up on a lot of different websites that had instructions for removing without the use of the usual makeup cleaners — something you may not have on hand.
If you actually dyed your hair last night, it’s probably best that you wash your head under the bathtub spigot before jumping into the shower. This is going to be a tough job. If there isn’t a bathtub, then use the sink.
Do this to prevent yourself from dyeing the rest of your body. The last thing that you want to do is go to class looking like a Smurf. No matter how many times you tell people that you are an Avatar, people will always ask if you are having a Smurfing good time.
Once you are clean, the issue of clothes arises. If you had planned on staying over at someone’s place, then you should have brought clothing. If planning a sleepover dressed as Wonder Woman was not in the plans, you need to reconsider your costume. Some costumes have some resemblance of normal clothing. In any case, all you will have to do is buy either a shirt or gym shorts. You could go to the University Center for this, but it’s probably best to just go to a convenience store.
If you’re at a 24-hour store like Wal-Mart, then there will also be a drug store section. If you were coming from home, this might also be a great place to stop. In that section of the store, there will be a place which sells baby diapers.
Now you don’t want to buy diapers. What you want is something that they sell to parents for when their babies have diarrhea. It’s called Pedialyte and it is in a big bottle. Next to it there will be some knock off brands, which will work equally well.
What you will do now while sitting in your car is chug something that taste like cough syrup. This will rehydrate your body. You can multitask at this point by thinking of how you got to this point in your life. This moment in which you are wearing cheap clothing and pounding back a kids’ medication is good motivation to prevent the events of last night from happening again.
Bad decisions aside, the lack of fluids are the reason you have that bad headache. So if you are at home or on campus and don’t feel like leaving, then it’s time to start getting some water and Powerade into your system.
Try to get to a nice sloshy feeling before you start to think about coffee or an energy drink to wake you up. Those things will only dehydrate you even more and give you a headache which would cause you to snap at even the nicest teacher.
People are different when it comes to food after a long night. I had a friend my first year of college swear by a big breakfast with eggs and hash browns, but this only made me want to vomit.
Bananas, however, don’t make me blow chunks. The potassium and sugar will help for the rest of the day. So, when it comes to food play, it’s safe to eat something you know you can stomach.
Now that you’re rehydrated, with food in your system, you should start to feel normal again. If you get the opportunity during the day, try to take a nap. Aside from that, just smile and bear it. At least you know that you’re still young and tomorrow you will feel better.
